Thank you for asking me about myself and about the challenges I face as someone who struggles with clutter and chronic disorganization. First of all, there are reasons why I have these issues. I may have learned these behaviours from a parent or maybe my parent was a neat freak and I just decided to do things differently than they did. Or, perhaps, I grew up in a home where there were a lot of children and we didn’t have a lot of money and I always felt like I didn’t have what I needed. There are reasons why I am challenged with my stuff.
I may have had a lot of trauma and losses in my life and get a lot of comfort being around all of my belongings and treasures. They may remind me of happier times in my life. If I have had some losses around relationships my stuff actually helps me to feel safe. It means that others will not come in and cannot hurt me.
There is a good chance that I experience mental health challenges and may suffer from Depression, Anxiety, ADHD and/or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I may cancel appointments depending on how I am feeling that day. I really need to feel I am in a good space to tackle any task. This work can bring up a lot of anxiety which is very scary for me.
If we are able to work together, please know that I may only be able to work for a short time. I will probably hit a wall at some point and we will need to stop until next time. Trust is a huge issue for me. In the past people have tried to help me by throwing out my stuff when I was away from my home for the day or longer. It felt like such a betrayal like a big part of myself was gone. It’s not helpful at all and I will likely just acquire even more stuff than I had before.
I need to be included in the plan for decluttering my space. Sometimes I will need you to explain to me in more detail as to what you think will help me. I might need to take some time to think about what I want to keep or to give away or let go of. Gentle guidance and questions are helpful to me. I want to feel like I have a say in what stays and what goes. I know what is important for me and I need to be a part of the decision making process or I will not learn anything at all. I need to take and have control over my stuff!
I know that I do have talents and strengths, but I usually forget or minimize them. It would be great if you could help me remember that those strengths will help support me in our process together.
If I know that you understand, it will help me to feel more comfortable with this process. Please think of me as a sister, a mother, a daughter, and know that if you can be non judgemental, patient, nurturing, flexible, accessible, respectful, and compassionate you will be able to help me to make more space in my life and to make progress in my home.
Thanks again for asking for my input and helping me.
These are my words but I would love to know what you think or what you might add to this letter. Please comment on my blog or in a private message if you prefer to email@example.com
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Send me an email (with up to 4 photos of your room, closet or other area) and your biggest challenge and goals for your space. I will send you a personalized response with helpful tips, advice, product ideas, encouragement and/or resources specific to you situation.
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Can’t wait to work with you!
Happy Decluttering my friends!