Making decisions about our stuff can be tricky. Questions like…… Where do I start? Do I love this? Do I need this? Should I keep this or donate it? What if I give this away and then I need it someday? I wonder if so and so would want this? Ugh!! So many decisions to make!
Those questions can really keep us stuck and possibly avoiding what we might have wanted to do in the first place. We often don’t know the answer to those questions and in a sense they keep you feeling safe or secure and in your comfort zone when you don’t make a decision. You don’t have to know or decide or worry about making a mistake.
Not making a decision really is making a decision. So, let’s say you come across an item as you are working on your stuff. The thought is “I don’t know what to do with this item, should I keep it or donate it? or Where does it belong? I just don’t know so I will put it here for now.” That probably feels better in that moment, it feels like you have done something but really you are just moving some stuff around and avoiding making a decision.
Making a decision can mean making a mistake but if you do nothing, you risk nothing, you don’t grow or move forward and you make no progress at all on your tough goals. Things are not going to be perfect and you won’t know that until you take the first step. There might be some missteps along the way and that is okay.
So, what do we do?
Some decisions are easier than others and unique to all of us. What to eat for dinner, what restaurant to go to, what to wear, what movie to watch, which road to take on a path? It’s all about practicing and trusting that it will be all good. And if it isn’t, it is really okay. We just now know what not to do and we try again.
We just need to start making decisions even if it feels uncomfortable. It is a practice that gets easier over time. We are practicing our decision making skills. Sometimes we call it “decluttering skills” The more we do the work, make decisions about sorting, organizing and decluttering we start to see and know more of what we want and don’t want. We start to trust ourselves with our decisions and we develop more confidence and self esteem in ourselves.
How are you at Decision Making? Drop me a line. Just reply to this email or comment below.
Here is a short Letting Go Video that is a part of my FREE Mini Course “Clutter, Acquiring and Letting Go – Keys to Success”. You can sign up here to receive the free email course.
Happy Decluttering!
I am a pretty quick decision-maker. Some people say that this makes me a good decision maker, but this isn’t always the case. Some of my decisions are good, others not so much. I just don’t enjoy that feeling of being stuck in the process, so I tend to make a decision and go on. Knowing that we won’t make perfect decisions is a comfort to me. I tell clients this as well, when they bemoan a bad purchase. It happens, let it go, and just move on.
Thanks Seana,
I love your attitude about decision making. So freeing to just try something and see what happens. Go with the flow and move on.
Decision-making is the number one thing that can keep my clients stuck. It is often what prompts them to reach out for help. There can be overwhelm because there are so many decisions to make. Or, there can be lack of confidence in making decisions. As you suggested, a fear of making the wrong decision.
I like to help my clients become more confident decision-makers. We do this by starting with the easier choices first…also known as the low hanging fruit. It will be different for each person, but discovering what those categories are and focusing on those first, will help develop the choice-making skills.
Hi Linda, Yes, too many decisions equals overwhelm. So true. Great idea to start with the easier choices. Clients start to feel more confident and it gets easier for them. Thanks so much!
Decision making is a huge issue for me, and I often make it harder for myself than I need to. I’ve learned that in many cases making a decision – any decision at all – is better than agonizing over what will be the “best” decision.
Hi Janet, Yes that is so true – sometime we just need to make the decision and then see what happens. I love this! Thank you for your comment
I love this post! I agree. Decisions are critical. Before deciding to declutter things, we need to decide what area to declutter and how much to declutter—determining the number of items will give limitations and help determine a stopping point. I found that not having these in place will create overwhelm.
Thank you so much Sabrina
Yes those initial questions are really great and would really help with the decluttering process.
🙂
Decisions are tough. I agree with the rest that this is what keeps our clients from making progress. Once clients work with a trusted professional organizer we can help move things along by asking questions. When it gets too uncomfortable or when a decision will truly have to wait for another time, I recommend putting the item in a pending or marinating box. We periodically review the contents of this box and see if the time is right to make one or more decisions about the items.
Hi Diane, I love the pending or marinating box. That is such a good idea and often we are not even needing or thinking about the items in question. Thank you
I have two sets of decision-making skills. If it involves spending money, I will dither and go back and forth on the right alternative, do research until the cows come home, and fret for a bit after I’ve made the decision. If the decision doesn’t involve money (or extra money beyond what I’ve already decided to spend), I’m quick on the draw. I know what to wear and pack, what to discard vs. keep, how to handle a personal or professional task. I trust my gut…as long as I don’t have to take a penny out of my pocket. I think my “letting go” skills were refined by skills my mother taught me when I was young, except for things related to paper, which I sort of logic’ed out over time.
Decluttering “by the rules” allows me to take emotion out of it; there’s no should I or shouldn’t I (let something go) because I’ve got rules based on the answers to questions (have I used it, when would I use it, how much space does it take up???) so it’s really a foregone conclusion that keeps me from letting things outstay their welcome. I suspect that if I allowed emotion to get in the way of what (for my personal things, not for my client work) needs to be purged, I might struggle as much as the average person.
So good Julie – I think I am like you when it comes to money and I am an Accumulator according to a Money Archetypes Quiz. Love your rules for decluttering and trusting your gut is so good. It can take awhile for people to get to that point though. Also, taking the emotion out of it is an interesting thought. Thank you of commenting.